Christian Protests That Produces Ungodly Behavior

Middle Tennessee is part of what is known as the Bible belt. “A church on every corner” is how we are depicted. For every church, there are five associate ministers waiting to hear “the call” to start their own church or begging God that main preacher will allow them to preach one Sunday. We have several national Christian organizations that are headquartered in Nashville: the Southern Baptist Convention, the National Baptist Convention, and the General Board of Discipleship of the United Methodist Church are just a few examples. Lifeway, RH Boyd, and the United Methodist Publishing House are Christian entities that produce church material for church folks to gain a better understanding and knowledge of God daily.

This area is home to several colleges that have Christian roots or missions: Belmont, David Lipscomb, Fisk, Meharry Medical College, Trevecca, and Vanderbilt are all titans in secondary education. These colleges have produced some of the most intelligent, nationally recognized folks who are highly respected throughout the world. Many national Christian conventions are held here as well. The National Religious Broadcaster (NRB) is one the most successful conventions held here annually. National Religious Broadcasters (NRB) is a non-partisan, international association of Christian communicators whose member organizations represent millions of listeners, viewers and readers. If you want to be on the television or radio and you want to call it a ministry, NRB is a conference you should attend. The Middle Tennessee area is also the number one region in the country for home school families. Many home school families cite religion as their primary reason for homeschooling. The number of private Christian schools in the area are too numerous to even begin to list.

With all Christ-centered organizations mentioned above, the behaviors of some church folks are keeping Middle Tennessee in the national spotlight. The spotlight seems to say we are church goers who are deeply devoted to our religious beliefs but are not practicing the tenets of loving our neighbors and Christ like acceptance of others. We are wearing hypocritical halos. I have received several calls from curious media friends from around the country asking what is happening in my beloved Volunteer state. My friends were stating that the many stories I have written about the Volunteer State’s generosity and philanthropy endeavors to those in need did not seem like the same state that is producing extreme ungodly behavior towards others who not of the Christians faith. It is a phenomenon that I am having a hard time trying to explain because I am perplexed as well.

Lately, there have been several protests against proposed Mosques in our area that have become very heated and have evoked fear in Christians that Islamic extremists are taking over. Really? With thousands of churches in the Middle Tennessee area that serves millions of Christians, three Mosques are a threat to the faith to Tennessee Christians? Hmm, let that soak for a minute. Protesters have gone from lawfully honking horns, signing petitions, and protesting Mosque locations at council meetings to someone crossing the line by burning construction equipment on the site of the property of the Murfreesboro’s Mosque, which is criminal. With the South’s ugly history of protests that have lead to the burning of property, the burning of the construction equipment was too close to numerous stories that I have heard from my parents and grandparents on the Civil Right battlefield. Many of the protests have been cloaked in biblical poetry and using constitutional sounding words that sound very unconstitutional. All of this protesting had me digging deep to separate fact from fear with a friend.

Since we debate political issues often for sport, I shared with her some of my concerns of where the protests can lead if voices of reasons do not speak up soon. Damaging property leads to harming individuals physically and neither are Godly behaviors. My concerns were deflected with her view that Islam was becoming the “new” religion of our country which she stated was founded on Judeo-Christian values. The discussion had us nursing our coffee cups for three hours.

For several weeks, her emails were sounding the alarm to take the country the back and the need for us to remember the constitution was founded by our Founding Fathers. I would reply that I refuse to live in fear. At our coffee summit, I gave her a copy of the Bill of Rights with the First Amendment highlighted. I asked her to read it out loud.

She read, “"Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the government for a redress of grievances." After she read it, we both sat in silent for a moment. I could feel her becoming angry in her silence. I said to her, “Fear can provoke us into mayhem and madness.” The Constitution that my friend wants us to get back to gives us the freedom of religion, no matter who we worship; it gives us freedom of speech to say what we want no matter how sane or vile it may be; it gives us the right to read this blog weekly through the freedom of the press; it give us the right to the freedom of assembly so we can meet to protest or pray, and allows us to complain about our government because we have the right to petition the government. That is what separates us from countries like Iraq, Iran and Afghanistan.

“Try calling the leader of China a socialist and see where it gets you,” I said to her with a smile. After another pot of coffee, we realized that we were going to have differing views on the actions of burning the equipment at the Mosque site. I finally pleaded: how can we read our bible daily and allow the hate and fear of others to fester from our pores? ‘Isn’t that the opposite of being a Christian,” I asked sadly. “I don’t hate them,” she said quietly. I was not trying to change her mind on any issues, I only wanted to her understand and respect my family’s heritage of non violent protests that I strongly believe in today. I have friends from all different backgrounds. We have dialogued about the Mosques buildings that have the media swarming in Tennessee like termites.

Tennessee has become a haven for national corporations over the last decade or so. With trade and industry booms, diversity in ethnicity and religion has followed. As we have opened our arms to invite others to Tennessee for economic reasons, we have to accept with those invitations an influx of other cultures. Those cultures which at one time were in the background are more visible because of the growth in our population, the anti-Muslim political climate, and the ever present media hype without a purpose.

In this age of social media, it is easy to adopt a Twitter mindset of follow and unfollow the constitution depending on how we feel about a particular subject matter. But as Christians, folks are supposedly to think and act different, right? Since there are Christian groups and church folks as numerous as the stars above in the Middle Tennessee area, I would have thought a leader would have stepped forward from one of the many national Christian organizations that are based here and calmed the masses with words that would curtail violent behavior knowing our Southern heritage of protests followed by cruelty. We are in desperate need of leaders who preach the gospel to remind us to practice the words that printed in our area by the hour. Let me close with the verse that I closed my coffee session with my friend.

19Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, 20and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age."

As great as the constitution, it is has undergone several revision. However, God's word has stood the test of time.

Photo Credit:(John A. Gillis/DNJ)

Article first published as Christian Protests that Produce Ungodly Behavior on Blogcritics.

Akoo Jeans Model, Dawn Montgomery, speaks to Genmaspeaks about Controversy

Everyone knows I love Twitter. One of my favorite folks on the social media site is Dawn Montgomery, a fashion model and writer. Dawn and I have known each other for over a year and have talked often about working together to do a charity fashion show for a few of my favorite non-profits here in Nashville.

I was drawn to Dawn because of her Twitter name, @MississippiDawn. My Twitter followers and Tennessee Tribune readers know I am from Mississippi and often share stories about my hometown. Dawn and I have endless Tweet streams catching up on all things in the Magnolia State. Born and raised in Hattiesburg, Miss., Dawn is attending college in Atlanta. Dawn is fast becoming one of hottest urban models in the U.S. Dawn not only models and writes but she also is a community activists, patron of the arts, and raising a young son. She is the first to arrive and last to leave, I am told by many. The community that she loves dearly, loves her back and it shows by the number of friends who thank her daily for endless deeds done out of the kindness of her heart.

Last week, Dawn sent me links to an ad campaign with Akoo Jeans, a clothing line by rapper T.I. I opened the links, saw Dawn’s face and thought, “She has landed another big job.” A few minutes later, Dawn sent me several more links with the same picture and asked, “Have you read this?” This was the Dawn that I love, always seeking advice and critique no matter how big the contract. It took me a few minutes to realize Dawn’s photo Akoo Jeans shoot was being blogged about around the country. Dawn’s Akoo billboard ad was asked to be removed by the Newark, New Jersey community and the Mayor Cory Booker for obscenity. Isn’t New Jersey the home of the Jersey Shores Reality TV Show that is watched and hate by millions? Newark’s Mayor Cory Booker was cutting a shine over a billboard because it was not a good image of the community. Within 24 hours, Dawn’s face was all over cable news. Wow, someone I knew was in the middle of mayhem and mess. On Twitter @mississippiDawn and Akoo were trending topics.

I called Dawn to find out what were her A, B, and C plans. Dawn who is media smart hired a publicist who had her responding to the crisis within a day. She was interviewed by Essence to address the controversy, the sexual content of the ad and the media bias towards urban vs. mainstream models. Being from Mississippi, Dawn and I conversed the way two Divas from the country do...straight to the point. I asked Dawn without any tack as soon as she said hello, “Are you neckit?” (You say it like it is spelled). She responded in true Diva dramatics, “You know me better than that!”

With that cleared up and out of the way, here’s Dawn’s exclusive interview with www.Genmaspeaks.com and The Tennessee Tribune.

Dawn, since I know you personally and most of our readers don’t, we are going to discuss the controversy first.

GSH: What was the mayhem and mess about?
Montgomery: The Akoo Billboard Ad featured me pulling downwards on a gentleman's pants. Newark, NJ's Mayor and citizens were upset at the sexually suggestive pose, and viewers felt as if this was not a great representation of African-Americans.

GSH: Were you surprised at the response from the community?
Montgomery: Yes, I was surprised at the response from the community. In the mainstream modeling industry, there are clothing ads (Calvin Klein, Abercombie & Fitch, Victoria's Secret) that market sexually suggestive ads and are rarely talked about or addressed in the media.

GSH: How long have you been modeling and was this the first time you faced this type of controversy?
Montgomery: This was the first time I faced controversy in my modeling career, and I have been modeling for 6 years. I do not like negativity, so I am turning this into something positive. In this Industry I have to make choices daily. I always think of my FAMILY when making decisions, and my morals & values guide my decision-making.

GSH: Would you do it again?
Montgomery: Would I do it again? Yes. I am a model and my job is to give the client what they ask for. The representatives from Akoo Clothing line & the photographer that shot the Ad Campaign discussed with me what they were looking for and showed me their vision images. I was allowed to do what made me feel comfortable in comparison to the vision images, and I did just that. I will be more mindful of my surroundings, because for some of my family members the gentleman's hand on my head struck a nerve with them. My family understood my decision and they support me. As long as I am able to have their support and show my family the images then I can continue to do my job.

Dawn, you imitated a toned down version of a Calvin Klein ad. You decided how you wanted to interpret the Calvin Klein Ad and through this controversy helped Akoo Jeans become a household name in a matter of days. Their marketing worked and you have become one of the most recognized faces in America. Now, that we addressed the madness, let’s talk about the Dawn Montgomery who is fierce about her love of family and helping others in your community.

GSH: What makes you passionate about making a difference with your life?
Montgomery: My upbringing makes me passionate about making a difference. I was raised around strong women that no matter what they lacked in their lives, they continued to help others. It is hard to help someone else when you know that you may not have what you want in life, but that drives me to do more.

GSH: When did you decided that THIS (your activism) is IT (needed now)?
Montgomery: Currently I am still trying to figure out what this is. I have always had a passion for making my voice heard in my community by volunteering and spreading the word about needed change. I currently use my Modeling & Writing Careers as ways of communicating how I feel about what is going on in my community today.

GSH: What woman has made a significance difference in your life?
Montgomery: My late grandmother, Dr. Rev. Gertie Smiley, made a huge difference in my life. When she was battling Breast Cancer she showed me how to be strong until the very end of your life. My grandmother always told me that every decision I made will affect someone close to me & I have to make good decisions daily. She was a community activist and she always spoke up when she needed to be heard. All of the women in my family are just like her, but she was so charismatic.

GSH: Could you share more about your family…anything you want me to know?
Montgomery: My grandmother's battle with Breast Cancer and death changed my life. My son was born a year later, and then 2 months after his birth Hurricane Katrina hit Mississippi. I am a single mother, and God has blessed me with an amazing support system of family members and friends. I have a mental illness, Bipolar/Manic Disorder, and I deal with this daily.

GSH: If you could change one thing today, what would that be?
Montgomery: I would not change anything. My days are difficult, but through the grace of God I make it through each day.


GSH: What advice do you give to other young women about following their dreams?
Montgomery: The advice I would give to other young women about following their dreams: RESEARCH! There is someone out there that has the career you want and you can learn a lot from researching how they got there. You will not travel in the same lane that they are in, but God created a lane just for you. I did not come into this industry naive. I learned how to put my portfolio together and set goals consistently for my career. Know the path you want to take, and understand that sometimes you have to walk that path alone. Learn what works best for you and master that. My late grandmother, mother, and aunt have all taught me these things that truly work for me today.

GSH: What are your future goals?
Montgomery: Next endeavors are; Graduating from Oglethorpe either in the Fall of 2010 or Spring of 2011, Getting my son started on the right path with his education as he enters Kindergarten (I am excited!), and I really want to have the opportunity of hosting a Sports Talk show either on radio or television. I am a huge College Football fan, and I love all sports.

Photo Credits:
Allen Cooley
Marion Designs
Mays Photography
20/20 Photography
Dawn Montgomery Agent
http://www.hdtheagency.com
PR www.twitter.com/ellabeepr
Dawn was recently photographed for Savoy Magazine for the current issue and interviewed by me for www.tsuradio.com

MCC Hearings...Open Mic Nites in Nashville

I have attended several of the hearings regarding the proposed plan for the Music City Center. This project is epic and historical as well. The largest of its kind proposed in Metro’s history, physically and fiscally. Metro government rolled out this ambitious plan that will be voted on by our Metro Council on Tuesday, January 19, 2009.

One of the things that has amazed me while listening to both proponents and the opposition to this mammoth project is the wonderful citizens of Davidson County that have stepped up to the podium meeting after meeting to express their thoughts on the how they see the MCC will shape the future of our great city. I have called each meeting I have attended, tweeted and blogged about “Poetry Nights from the Ville”. The voters have become political savvy poets at the microphone.

Many of the words that have been spoken communicate the zeal and passion of the voters in the community. No matter what side of town you live on, the poets have spoken zingers that have left me speechless and in awe that their words were uttered in a public forum so boldly and with straight faces. The MCC project shows how serious voters have become and are not taking this project for granted. Some have asked very practical questions, while others have preached sermons and I have heard a dissertation or two on public policy. This city is not just filled with only musicians but we have amateur and professional rhymesters, writers, critics, and lyricists, clothed as voters that come in every shade and hue of the rainbow. I have captured questions and statements that have heard repeated several times or ones that left me wondering should I trademark a remark and sell it on a T-shirt.

Nashville is “Shovel Ready” on day one.
Music City Center will create 1,000 construction jobs.
I am for the MCC but I thought it should be on land the city already owns, why not the thermal site?
We really need a hotel.
Nashville will be the most desirable city to build a hotel; we just don’t have any takers at the moment.
We have more things going on in this city other than music!
We don’t have textbooks in our schools? What about Jefferson Street?
Nashville is a tale of Two Cities.
The only way to expand this is to expand our tax base.
The stated goal is to have 20% minority and women owned contracts for the convention center.
Why are we focused on MCC when we have 28% unemployment among Black males in Nashville?
What is a medical mart?
Don’t get your hopes up on your jobs coming to our community.
Please slow down, this will be the biggest decision you will make for this city.
No one has mentioned cost over runs.
Give us the tools to work with.
The government should not be in the business of owning hotels.
I am a libertarian.
I represent the SEIU of Meharry and Metro General, they are the only hospitals in the area they are union.
I am a metro employee I have not gotten a living wage increase in two years.
Please vote no and let the people decide.
I have not gotten a raise either but that’s okay, I want to know about how we are going to pay for this when we don’t have money for anything else.
Folks are losing their homes to foreclosure…that is tax revenue the city does not collect.
I believe in this city and I want what is best for the city of Nashville.
Why are we doing business with Goldman Sach?
Goldman Sach used bonds for the city of San Diego and the city sued them for fraud. Aren’t the Goldman Sach bonds being dumped by China?
Metro school employees’ majority are against this project…we had 400 layoffs for Metro employees last years.
Metro employees have not received their longevity pay for the 2nd year in a row.
I asked 15 council members if there was a risk to the taxpayers, they all said yes.
Nashville has three classes of people; the rich, the potential homeless, and the homeless.
If Metro council members vote for this convention center, they can hang up their political careers.
Professional people built the Titanic and an amateur built Noah’s ark. Which boat would you rather be on?
Nashville Airport spent 60 million on contracts and of that you spent 1.8 million with minorities and you feel good about that?
That’s what the paper said.
This is not personal.
We love to wave and shout and that gets us nothing, we do not need to leave hear without a plan of action.
We have seen the same thing for twenty years; people are sick and tired of being sick and tired.
We have contractors that come into our neighborhoods on minority procurement and a Black contractor is never hired for the jobs.
Who will be policing the subcontracting?
1 million was spent on a disparity study that found Metro’s contracting discriminatory.
Another million was spent and the exact same time was said.
We must add goods and services, unbundle contracts, and offer legal and financing help.
Why are law firms that have not place a bid on MCC being paid, when I won the sub-contract as a minority lawyer and can’t get work from Bone?
I have veto power on financial payments.
The mayor left after fifteen minutes, he is going to have to stop that.
Are these the same folks who did not want May-Town but voting for MCC?
China is dumping Goldman Sach bonds…their bonds are not worthy to be toilet paper!

By the way, the lady who made the reference about Goldman Sach said that without any liquor on her breath and I did not see her sipping from a flask in the hallway. As I said before, folks have become poets about the MCC projects. Whichever way you lean on this issue, for or against, let it be known. Where we go from here is anyone’s guess but I do pray the Metro Council use discernment and common sense. Fancy verbiage is not necessary when one is doing right by the people and our tax dollars.

As for me, I want oversight, transparency, and no fuzzy math. The financing sounds iffy in a down economy to me. Watching how our federal government threw away taxpayer dollars to bail out the banks has me leary. The banks continued with their business as usual attitude and actions which makes me think long and hard of any government entity which says "we will work the details out later but we need this right now or else". We must learn from our mistakes and hold our elected officials accountable; federal, state, and yes, locally. If you are for this project, be proud not defensive. If you believe in the MCC, explaining why 1+1=2 on Monday, should not tie you in a knot on Tuesday. If you are against the building of MCC, don’t be ashamed. But please come with facts not Pius preaching. I know we are in the bible belt but quoting scriptures must not leave folks baffled. Lastly, if you are unsure about the MCC project, don’t be bashful about asking questions…I have. Lots of them!

So in Style Dolls of Color are a Big Hit for Mattel

For the last several years, this time of year have me flopping around in my Ms. Santa suit and busy with nonstop gift wrapping and delivering of gifts to my little friends at Grace Eaton Child Care. It is not an official program but Grace Eaton is a long time customer of Holmes Pest Control and it is our way of having fun serving others and saying thank you to a customer who provides quality child care to low wealth families in the community. We love the families that have we have met over the years.

Shopping for the children begin several months in advance. My Ms. Santa duties have made me famous at flea markets, close out stores, and discount retailers looking for the most requested items, Black Barbie dolls and bikes. My hunt for the elusive Black Barbie doll has made me an expert with the Mattel folks. I keep up with the coming and goings of all things Barbie with my ears perked to hear any word in Toyland about the newest craze. Imagine my surprise when one of the most eccentric doll collectors I know dropped the news in my inbox at the beginning of the year that Mattel was launching a line of Barbie Dolls designed by a woman of color and that the dolls would be based on strong influences from the African American community. Shut your mouth I thought, God has heard my cry!

Enter Stacey McBride-Irby and her line of dolls called “So in Style”, SIS. McBride-Irby, a fashion designer who designed adult and children clothing before joining Mattel, inquired about a job working for the toy powerhouse twelve years ago. She was hired as an assistant to an African American designer. McBride-Irby love of her Barbie dolls from her childhood inspired her to become a fashion designer years later. She played with her dolls until she was 13 years old. After putting down her dolls, she started drawing and designing fashion for people.

What an inspirational story! The community of color should have Ms. McBride-Irby speaking at every pre-teen adolescent event in the country and every Mom should read about Ms. McBride-Irby and ignore the cell phones request from their pre teen daughters. Give them a doll is my new motto! I could not wait to get my hands on the SIS line of dolls for the young girls at Grace Eaton. Imagine my disappointment when my eccentric doll collector friend sent me an email a few months back asking my thoughts about the controversy over the SIS dolls. “What controversy”, I asked in my reply. Never asked a doll collector a question about doll news, you will regret it. I was sent several links questioning the ethnic looks of the doll. My immediately thoughts were folks are crazy. Why are folks wasting energy on a non controversial event for the sake of controversy? Don’t we have enough issues in the world than to examine the “fullness” of a doll’s lips or the texture of a doll’s hair? If I was not serious, I would be laughing.

A woman of color works in a field that very few are highlighted for their creativity or contributions to the marketplace, designs a line of dolls that represent positive aspirations for young girls of any color and we judge them. We find fault in a woman achieving her dreams in life the old fashion way…working hard and using her God given talents to encourage other women to do the same. Please give me a break. I refuse to participate in the self-made oki doke.

For years, I have searched for the dolls of color. Trust me they are hard to come by. Hermitage area retailers know me by sight. My dolls search starts in August looking for the upcoming Holiday Barbie. I have gone into the stores late at night and helped workers check the back docks looking for dolls for Grace Eaton children. I would wait patiently as they searched through boxes of Mattel packages and hand me four dolls out of forty.

The idea that Mattel has addressed the ethnic heritage of one culture means they are listening to their customers and will soon have lines that represent other ethnic groups of people as well. The variety creates more interest and more interest in Mattel products means more dollar spent. The more money means more profit for the company. A profitable company reinvests in its people and new product lines. There are many young designers taking note of Ms. McBride-Irby success and will start to work harder and smarter to imitate her work ethics. These are all good things no matter what color you are. And people of color are not the only ones buying the SIS line of dolls. Hallelujah for that!

As for the beautiful dolls, I bought several dolls in the past from Mattel that were inspired and designed by Ms. McBride-Irby. When the Alpha Kappa Alpha sorority celebrated their 100th Anniversary, I gave several retired AKAs in the community a Mattel doll designed by Ms. McBride-Irby. All the women were leaders who served the community faithfully for years but do not spend as much time in the spotlight in their latter years. They continue to help me raise money for non-profits without the pressure. They use their checkbooks and influence to get things done behind the scenes. None have ever asked for recognition and I believed the dolls were the perfect gifts instead of the traditional trophy organizations give to say thank you to volunteers. The dolls were a big hit. I had each doll put in a doll case with their name engraved on the case. The response to this small gesture left me speeches when one recipient of the dolls sent me a check for $5,000 to “help” me out! I love those women who wear their pearls and “help” me out! (Note to self…send Ms. Mack another doll this year, I need “help” for my toy drive.)

Everything about the “So in Style”(SIS) dolls show love and dedication of ones craft, an appreciation of culture and an attention to details that fashion divas like me adore. When I picked up several dolls last week, each were accompanied by a little sister. I knew right away that the designer was showing the importance of mentoring in our community. Each box comes with the description of the dolls’ personalities, the fashion style, and what subjects they liked in school. Wow, nothing left to chance including making sure young girls of color understand the value of getting an education and not just playing with your doll that looks similar to you. Ms. McBride-Irby is someone I am proud of; a woman, an entrepreneur, a designer, and a role model. And she loves Twitter. She tweets too! You can follow her online at www.twitter.com/StaceyMcirby. You can also check out Stacey McBride-Irby on the web at http://www.barbie.com/activities/friends/soinstyle/. As you can see, there is no controversy here; just pure talent, inspiration, and a love of community that cannot be disputed.

Now that you know more about Black Barbie dolls and the “So in Style” line designed by Ms. McBride-Irby, please stop by the toy department this Friday and load you basket with toys and extra dolls for me. I am going to need all the help I can get making sure that the children at Grace Eaton have a wonderful Christmas! Be safe and have a great week.

Photo credits: Stacey McBride-Irby and Alpha Kappa Alpha dolls Mattel
Photo of me in my Ms. Santa suit with bad lighting...my son, Franz.

A Sharecropper's Healthcare Plan

My grandfather never held political office but he was born for the political arena. He knew the issues before the issues became stories. The summer of ’75 was my introduction to political campaigns, thanks to my grandfather who I affectionately called “Daddy”.

My grandfather was asked that year to work on an ambitious gubernatorial campaign that would include Blacks and Whites working together. This campaign would focus on the “The working man’s friend”. The lack of job security was one issue that united Mississippians. “Everyone needs a job,” was impressed upon my grandfather. The promise of bringing manufacturing jobs to a state that had relied heavily on agriculture caught my grandfather’s attention. Daddy was a lover of politics, but reserved a fair amount of skepticism for anyone in political office. One of his favorite sayings was “They all lie and will eat their young to get elected.” But Daddy seemed enthusiastic about this particular campaign. I was nine years old working beside my grandfather, the master of political campaigns.

Daddy learned every candidate inside and out and taught his grandchildren everything about grass root campaigning. Pick a candidate and Daddy could tell you about his childhood, his personal life, his military service, his political view points and most importantly, the issues. Daddy was not entrenched in party affiliations but believed financial independence for families was more important than a letter by the politician’s name. Lack of job readiness and the skyrocketing unemployment could not be ignored. “Stick to the issues,” my grandfather told us over and over as we knocked on doors and shared with everyone their vote was important. “Don’t debate fear and hate,” he would add. Fear? Hate? Wait a minute. Why was he mentioning fear and hate when he wanted us to help register voters, give out campaign cards and hang posters on electric poles along Hwy 61? I dared not pose my questions out loud…no one questioned my grandfather.

We hit the counties that were heavily agricultural. Not cities or small towns but the countryside where soybeans and cotton fields grew as far as the eye can see and little shanty houses were dotted every few acres. That is where I encountered the fear of the unknown that was meshed with hatred of learning the truth. Knocking on doors was an education of a lifetime. One encounter will always remain with me.

I knocked on the door of a sharecropper’s home. I was prepared with my best repertoire with a smile. An elderly woman answered the door looking at me like I was an alien from another world as I extended my hand to shake hers. I stood straight and tall in my campaign t-shirt with ribbons tied on my ponytails. I had a lunch box which I used to keep my campaign fliers, voter lists and property information. I shared about jobs and employment as if I was saying my Easter speech at church.

Her response to my banter was unexpected. She spoke with hostility as she informed me her land would not be taken from her. ‘They’ were not going to remove her from her home. “This is my land,” she repeated sternly as she pointed to no place in particular and no one was going to take it. I glanced out at the acres of crops planted up to the steps and looked back at her, announcing innocently, “This is not your land you, you pick cotton for Mr. Jones. Daddy wants to help you get a job so you can buy your own house.” (Mr. Jones, the owner of the land, lived in the big yellow house at the end of the dirt road that we could see from the front porch.)

At that moment, the Mississippi River dried up that day. A nine year old was telling an elder that she didn’t know what she was talking about and shattering her belief that she owned the land that she toiled for decades. Watching her expression change, I knew I was in trouble with her and my granddaddy.

Our beliefs, accurate or inaccurate, can help us survive challenging circumstances.The woman's world view was consistent with what most sharecroppers believed. Although they lived and worked on land that many would never own, many believed that the landowner would one day give it to them because they were told this by the owner, who in turn, benefited from them believing the lie. I handed her a property list from my lunch box that listed the landowner; it also stated he was a registered voter. She was not listed as a registered voter. She asked, “Where did you get this from little girl?” I said proudly, “Daddy. He got it from the court house.” Beaming, I told her to go to the court house and ask for the records from the clerk. My mother, who taught me about records and deeds, worked in the tax assessor’s office assisting homeowner’s file their homestead exemptions.

The woman grew pale and seemed to age as she told me she was going to tell my folks that I had sassed her. She sat down abruptly on a bench and as she continued to mumble it was her land. I did not know if I had educated her or killed her. I decided if I am going to get a whipping, I better make sure I told everything. I proceeded to tell her how much land Mr. Jones owned throughout the county. My words were backed up by the property list. But she continued to say she owned the land as if she was trying to convince herself. I remember another saying of my grandfather’s “Never argue with a fool, they will either win the argument or kill you.” Sensing her despair and frustration, I backed off the porch and wished her a good day as I skipped off to catch up with my cousins who were waiting. Hearing the bench move, my skipping was replaced by running. Fear for my safety made me run faster. The more things change the more things remain the same.

How many understand the issues that have polarized communities around the nation with fear of what ifs and misinformation? The town hall meetings shown on cable news are as confusing as the language being used to describe the events. The media has focused on the drama rather than the real issues.

Have you read the bill, HR 3200? Not the talking points given to industry insiders, pundits or politicians’ stomp speeches, but the actual bill itself. I have been reading the bill for the last month. I have not made it to page 500 of 1,081 pages document. I called my insurance agent to get his input about a particular passage and he was taken aback. I am self employed. My deductible is $10K and all visits are paid out of pocket until that deductible is met. This summer, I paid thousands of dollars in medical payments for my child who had taken ill suddenly. My monthly premiums are $398.00. I have never filed a medical claim in fifteen years. The doctors’ invoices are paid by me and the insurance company premiums are paid whether I work or not. The more I write, the more I feel like the sharecropper. I am working to pay for nothing.

I contacted my primary care physician to discuss a few issues about my healthcare plans for the future. I was asked to set an appointment. The consultation was going to be considered an office visit. I would need to pay $125. (Note to self, find a new doctor this week.)

As life intersects with today’s political scene, the sharecropper’s despair and frustration desribes how many feel about healthcare. We are faced with “choices” that many do not understand, will not be able to buy and will never be able to vote on. We cannot be like the sharecroppers who never received the benefits from being landowners because they did not know the truth about the property they labored on and did not own, we cannot accept what we are told. We must ask questions and educate ourselves about the issues. Talking points and massive hysteria will never stand up to honest scrutiny. Fear only breeds contempt and contempt will leave us with empty promises, political rhetoric and DC’s business-as-usual-culture.

We, the people, will never have the health care provided to our politicians under the golden dome. We elected them to serve us, all of us, but often politicians serve themselves first. Remember what Daddy said. “They eat their young.” HR 3200 has become an off shoot to issues that politicians will not speak truth to power. They are more concerned about maintaining their office than giving us real answers.

I have shared my thoughts about the bill with every sitting U.S. Representatives from the state of Tennessee and the White House. Have you shared yours? I urge everyone to read the bill for themselves, ask questions of insurance agents and doctors as well as your elected officials. I would like to hear more discussion around insurance reform which drives the health care bus but that's me. Let’s not accept the sharecropper’s stake in the reform debate. Instead let's hold our politicians accountable for the premiums our tax dollars pay for their insurance plans.

For HR3200 - http://docs.house.gov/edlabor/AAHCA-BillText-071409.pdf
For changes www.govtrack.us

Mr. Officer

Have you ever been stopped by a cop for a reason that made absolutely no sense? Everyone has a story. I have learned by trial and error that my attitude often determines the outcome of the situation. When my sons were becoming older teens who wanted to drive, my fear of an attitude with a police officer was overwhelming. National headlines have given credence to the pain of mothers who have lost sons as a result of routine traffic stops that lead to death, especially for young black men.

Whether we like it or not, an officer is in charge when one is stopped. The questions, the tone, and the information that is written in the police report are orchestrated by the officer. What I have tried to instill in my sons is to keep the conversation respectable but short. It is “yes sir” or “no sir” at all times, regardless of what others may think.

Keep your hands on the steering wheel and your body relaxed to help the officer remain unruffled, I would plead. No jerky movements, I have counseled. Your body language and tone of voice is being scrutinized by an officer with a badge and gun. By staying calm, you can keep the interaction limited. Paying attention to your mom’s instructions can add years to your life.

Ages ago in a small town in Mississippi, my grandparents imparted the same words to me.

My sons are part of the Millennial Generation. Their curiosity can be mistaken for defiance. A question like, “What did I do?” can land them handcuffed in the back of a squad car if they are dealing with an officer, who has no patience for young people questioning them. Questioning a cop can be perceived as disrespectful and unacceptable. The more questions peppered at an officer can extend your time with him/her. That extension of time can lead to; unfair treatment, embarrassment, humiliation or in many cases “accidental” death.

I warned my eldest, on many occasions, that driving around with friends could attract a cop’s attention who may assume he was participating in gang activities. Of course, my kids believed these tirades were illogical and I was being overprotective. For some folks, you have to show them the light.

To put my words into application, I once asked a recent graduate from the police academy to help my eldest son understand that my worries were valid. He assured me he would teach him an unforgettable lesson. Several evenings later, my unsuspecting man-child was stopped by the graduate and was asked a slew of unimportant questions.

Where are you going tonight? Is this your car? Why are you out so late? What do your parents do?

The list was endless. The barrage of inquiries was intended to irritate and distract. As my son started to lose his composure and show his annoyance, the officer became more “aggressive” my son said later.

Consequently, he ended up on the hood of his SUV faced down and was told to address the officer as “Mr. Officer, sir”. After being given a fictional ticket and the fright of his life, he came home shaking with rage. As he tried to explain his terrorizing encounter he experienced, I continued the interrogation by asking about his actions that provoked the officer. I could hear the disbelief in his voice as he tried to repeat the sequence of events. I was not interested in the cop’s behavior but his responses to the cop. I saw the white hot anger on his face. I remind him that his exasperation was what others experienced daily.

You are lucky to be alive and you should never forget tonight, I told him.

The next day, his dad shared the same sentiments,

Son, you may be right but anytime you have a run in with a cop, YOU have to remain in control. He has a gun and a badge. You have to live to tell what happened.

Some criticized me for the extreme measure I took to teach that lesson. But when I see the disproportionate number of traffic stops that turned deadly for young black men, I am glad he was stopped by a trusted friend. I advocate mandatory cop interaction classes for all drivers. Tasers have replaced guns as weapons of choice by officers who have used them on everyone from teens to 70 year old ladies. Recent news coverage show tasers can have deadly outcomes as well.

When asked to discuss "Gates Gates" on a national radio show last month, I declined. My frank thinking would not have fit into the national conversation about the Harvard Professor’s arrest. Was it racism at play? To me, the real story was the inconsistency in the 911 recording and the police report. Focusing on Gates’ education or his statue in life had nothing to do with the arrest. Common sense from driving down Hwy 61 in Mississippi and Andrew Jackson Blvd. in Hermitage, TN has trained me to keep the conversation with an officer to a minimum. If I am treated unfairly by an officer, then my influence and contacts would be used to seek justice in a court of law. It is better to walk away alive with a bruised ego, than to end up in jail or worse…in a morgue.

Dinner and Fleas? How not to Entertain 101

I attend many social events in Nashville. My fundraising has evolved into a full-time love affair for the causes I support. And because of my passion, I get invites weekly to parties, events, fundraisers, and social gatherings galore. I am out and about often. I met a nice lady several weeks ago, who attended a fundraiser where I was honored for my work with young people. We talked briefly and promised to follow up with each other.

After exchanging several emails and phone calls, she invited me to a dinner party at her home. She seemed very sincere about helping others and she was aware that I speak often at environmental engagements around the country. She was also curious about the ecological products I use in my business. We shared common interests and had mutual clients.

I accepted her invitation to her party. Her home was in an exclusive neighborhood and I was guaranteed by another party lover that I would enjoy myself and make contacts that would be worth the forty minute drive to her home. Being the professional networker that I am, I could not wait for the big day.

At the party, I saw others I knew. Her home was exquisitely decorated and there were staff to attend to every whim of her guests. Salomon, caviar, smoked trout, and to my surprise, fried catfish nuggets, were just a few of the tempting tidbits that was so beautifully displayed on gigantic silver trays and platters. A bar was stationed in every room downstairs of the home. The décor was summery and southern, no detail spared. I sneaked off to the kitchen to introduce myself to the cater, to ensure I would have a goody bag of catfish to take home. After peeping in the kitchen, the caters were friends and I felt relieved that the food was being prepared by folks who I knew. (Part of my home training from Mississippi is to always know who is cooking the food.)


Thirty minutes into the party, I felt a sting on my leg. Immediately, my spidey senses were alarmed. After being in the pest control business for nearly two decades, I have been stung or bitten by every little creature on earth it seems. Bug repellent for outdoors, antibiotics, antidotes all go in my makeup before my lip gloss. Two minutes later, I felt the second, third, and fourth bites. I excused myself and rushed to the bathroom to give myself a once over. In the powder room, I was not alone. Another guest was intensely looking at her legs. I said, “Oh my, you too”. As we were inspecting ourselves, I pulled out an alcohol swab and started dabbing at a growing red bump. The other woman introduced herself quickly as Julie and said, “You are prepared”. I told her that I owned a pest control company. She knew who I was right away. I poured the contents of my purse out and I spent the next ten minutes doctoring on both of us.

We returned to the party and I noticed several other women were swatting at their legs. I went to the owner and asked if she had any pets. She said yes, several terriers and two chows that were put away. Her babies she informed me. I told her that I was bitten and she had fleas. She said, “I thought I got rid of them.” I stared back stunned, and asked about her treatment schedule. She had her home treated earlier in the week, she informed me. Now, I am pissed because I know she did not use my company and it takes at least two weeks to get fleas under control. The follow up is done in ten days, so she could not have had a follow up treatment. As I was talking to the hostess, we were interrupted by another guest who said she had been bitten by 'something'. The guest then turned to me and asked was I there to take care of the problem. What the hell? No, she didn’t. Yes, folks she asked me to kill the fleas.

I could not get out of there faster enough. I came home with my legs riddled with bites and I was insulted on two levels. I was invited to someone’s home who knew I owned a pest control company, who had conversed with me for several weeks to come to her party and had the audacity to use another pest control company. I have three in college, that job could have bought three text books and a coke. Second, I am at her party as a guest and I was asked to exterminate the pests. In my new BCBG dress, are you kidding me? Now if I had worn something older, sure.

And to add to my burning anger, I left my catfish! Damn. What a night.

After all the planning that was put into this event, the hostess forgot one of the most sacred tenets of entertaining, making sure your party is not remembered for the uninvited guests;ants, spiders, roaches or fleas. This tale of entertaining horror could have been prevented. If you are not using Holmes Pest Control; do not throw a summer extravaganza.

Photo Credits: Erik Johnson,ASAM, HPC

AEG Teaches BET "How to be an Entertainment Company" 101

After watching the coverage of Michael Jackson, I noticed many similarities and differences between the AEG and BET televised events. Both are companies that are in the business of staging concerts, television productions and are part of larger conglomerates. BET targets African-American between the ages 18-34 as their marketing base. AEG developed and operates the $150 million official U.S. Olympic Training Facility.

AEG, which was heavily invested in the Michael Jackson upcoming tour, is part of AEG Live. The AEG brand includes managing sport arenas around the world, merchandising, and corporate sponsorship and marketing. BET is part of Viacom which includes VH1, MTV, Nickelodeon, CMT and Comedy Central to name a few. Anyone in the entertainment industry would recognize the power of three short letters, BET or AEG, which employ thousands. That would include camera operators, sound engineers, set designers, travel agents and key board operators. Both entities have contact to talented artists worldwide and can sermon them at a moment’s notice.

AEG’s commitment to excellence was evident in the production of MJ’s home going ceremony. From the details of the printed program to the orchestrated performances of the stars, their desire to ensure MJ’s messages of empowerment, hope, humanitarian endeavors, and his musical genius were reflected in every facet of the production. As I have said previously, how a show starts usually determines how it will end. With the opening song “Going to see the King”, you knew the program would have a spiritual connotation despite the fact an entertainment company was in charge. The attention to details was impeccable. His coordinated brothers were his pall bearers who wore his signature glove. It reminded us that MJ started his musical journey with his brothers. They honored MJ’s independence from the group, by wearing his coveted trademark with loving pride. That symbolic touch was the start of a service that remained elegant from beginning to the end.


BET repeated excuse that it only had a few days to prepare a ‘tribute’ revealed their commitment to mediocrity and throwing things together at the last minute. Their justification for the lack of quality and care gave life to the word “ghetto”. The artistry of the talent on the stages gave you a glimpse of how the two brands view themselves. AEG understood that the eyes of the world were on them and how it managed this program was an investment in how they will be perceived by everyone. BET was the first to honor MJ’s legacy but did not understand the significance of the world’s penetrating glare. The program was marketed as a tribute to MJ but they were not able to turn off their usual misogynistic, sexist, and degrading antics of its own people to realize the social responsibility that was expected of them by fans from around the world to honor MJ’s legacy. BET also misjudged its community and the power of the internet, via blogs and Twitter, to do what others have not been able to accomplish for years, shame them for their programming.

There are many actors and actresses in black community but only a few have won Oscars. Both AEG and BET had African-American Oscar Winners, Jamie Fox and Jennifer Hudson, on their stages. Jamie and Jennifer are musical prodigies but Jennifer used her voice to echo MJ’s talent and Jamie used his voice to mock MJ. Funny stories were shared by many close to MJ at AEG’s event; their stories were heartfelt and respectful. Absence was the buffoonery that Jamie exhibited at BET.

AEG included various artists from Motown, which was part of MJ’s history as well as a strong influence in the black community. BET had access to Motown executives and artists also. They have honored Diana Ross, Barry Gordy, and Quincy Jones in recent years. I remember Miss Ross admonishing the audience to respect each other with their lyrics and dances. Both companies had athletes on stage. AEG athletes, Kobe and Magic, shared firsthand stories about MJ that made everyone laugh. BET’s Athlete of the Year, LeBron James, was booed by the audience. No public apology was issued to LeBron James or his legions of fans watching. AEG used their arsenal of contacts for the greater good and used MJ’s music to unite the world. In contrast, BET does not understand the value of maintaining healthy community and artistic relationships from different genres, musical eras, and backgrounds.



Each song that was performed at the memorial highlighted MJ’s legacy. His songs were the heart of the service. The songs that were not his songs, like Smile, were song because they were meaningful to him and touched MJ in a special way. The song “Every Girl” included in BET’s show and sung by baby maker, Lil Wayne, seems an odd choice whether you are a fan of MJ or not. It’s hard to believe Lil Wayne cared about a tribute to MJ. But on the other hand, Usher’s performance was loving and unforgettable. Not only did he move the audience emotionally with his presentation, but you knew his tearful tribute was from the heart. In fact, when I listened to BET’s replay, the tribute was riddled with profanity, plugs for new releases, concerts appearances, and various BET “products”, i.e. reality shows, that will do more harm than good to its demographics.


There was no stage or casket sponsorship with AEG. But BET’s sponsors were mentioned every few minutes. Jennifer Hudson, who wore a modest white dress, did not leave us questioning her attire. Whereas Beyonce’s white outfit, left many bewildered. Both women had others on stage with them, but the additional people on the stage with Jennifer were the chorus who gave you a visual that MJ’s songs reflected his admiration of diversity and international inclusion. Beyonce’s extras on stage were part of her costume change that emphasize her “showmanship” not MJ’s words that tells us, “In the promise of another tomorrow, I'll never let you part for you're always in my heart”. AEG even muzzled Joe Jackson and did not prominently showcase him or his coonery. BET gave him a world stage that left us all wondering why in God’s name would anyone give him a mic or MJ’s children.



AEG gave an emphasis to Michael Jackson’s childlike heart in many respects and ended their memorable tribute with children singing his words, with smiles and joyful hearts that radiated from the stage. The last words spoken regarding the greatest entertainer in the world was an unexpected announcement from his daughter that her “Daddy was the greatest father in the world”. It left critics speechless and moved the rest of the world to tears.


On the other hand, BET’s children who were on stage left me speechless and in tears but for reasons that has been addressed by thousands of angry emails and tweets to Debra Lee.

In the end, AEG showed us it was not about Michael Jackson, but the mark he left on the world. They managed to show that in spite of the years of suspicion, two trials and media debauchery, he made contributions that cannot be argued or denied. His monetary gifts of 300 million to global agencies have touched thousands of lives but his songs will live “forever, and forever, and forever”. BET showed us that it was all about them, and they shot themselves in the foot. They drew attention to everything that is wrong with BET’s brand and why it hurts the black community on a wide-reaching stage. The stereotypes of the African- American community, that many fight every day, were front and center.

AEG will make millions from the reproduction of ceremony and the memorabilia copyrights. They invested in MJ’s ceremony and made their name a household brand. Their stock will increase and they will become known as the entertainment company for quality production events. BET made a few thousands and proved why they are becoming irrelevant in the entertainment community. They will be forever and forever and forever remembered for their failed attempt to honor an African-American musical intellectual that transcended race, religion, and politics. They did not take the time to view the long term value of honoring MJ right the first time, even on a smaller scale. The lessons AEG showed us by their actions should be a life lesson for everyone not only BET; the value of your brand is reflective of the standards you set.
Photo Credit: MTV, NBC, www.realtalkNY.net

A Gentle Giant, Remembering Steve McNair

Life in Tennessee is different from my upbringing in Mississippi. That statement is not a criticism but to share my viewpoint is often shaped by my simple home training. I fight daily against pop culture’s idolization of individuals to keep myself and my kids grounded. I refuse to put anyone on a pedestal. People are people and their interactions with others speak louder than any publicist’s press release. Having worked in the PR field, I know this all too well.

My grandfather and my dad showed, by their actions, that fathers are providers and protectors of their families. Uncles from Chicago to Mississippi filled in the gaps along the way. The men in my family, though not always perfect, led by positive example. In turn, their example helped me to teach my children what was expected of them. One of the lessons I have taught my kids is to never worship anyone, especially stars and athletes..

My kids' love for their dad comes with much admiration and respect. Both grandfathers are active in their lives and they are surrounded by positive male role models. I seek out community “doers” to help mold them so they may learn firsthand; life is not all about them.

Coach Gilliam has been mentioned every day since they were tots. Something Coach said or did is repeated often. Coach’s influence is everywhere in our household; from my sons’ love of TSU to the Steelers’ memorabilia everywhere. When my oldest son went off to college, he had a solid curriculum of Coach Gilliam’s lessons taught to him by his dad. When he moved into his first apartment, to our surprise and delight, his neighbor was none other than the legendary Coach Gilliam. The stories of his youth came full circle. He became a Coach Gilliam story teller and started the second generation of Holmes that was impacted by Coach Gilliam. He is now Coach Holmes in graduate school passing on the stories of a living legend that he loves dearly.

Steve McNair is the only other person who passed my star/athlete litmus test with my family. McNair was considered “kin”, a transplant from Mississippi and an Alcorn (pronounced All-corn) graduate. In my extended family, ASU or JSU were the schools of choice. Only a few of us did not follow the pack. With Alcorn being only few miles from my home, I knew Alcorn like my kids know TSU. My mom, Dr. Stringer, taught at ASU for years. The SWAC was the NFL to me. Several relatives played ASU sports, so I know McNair’s bio like my kids know Joe Gilliam. McNair’s leadership and generosity was well known prior to him stepping into the NFL spotlight. Even after he became a huge star, he remained humble and without pretense.

I saw Steve McNair’s kindness without the filter of PR lenses. He visited Bethlehem Centers (BCN) to encourage the youth and wowed many young boys at his football camps in several states. Corn, my youngest son, attended his camps and was in awe that a NFL pro threw him the ball. Several McNair’s camp participants are now playing college football. Two years ago, McNair funded a summer program for BCN. To show the agency’s appreciation, Joyce Searcy asked me to take framed artwork by the kids to McNair. You would have thought I handed over a Grammy. He was gracious and I remember saying, “Joyce is ‘kin’, she’s from Miss.” Of course, he knew, since Joyce had no problem reminding McNair about their shared Mississippi connections.

When I became Founder/Chair of Minorities in Pest Management (MPM), I traveled often to raise money to award scholarships to get students involved in the lucrative but elusive pest control industry. My desire to help HBCUs’ students was usually met with opposition from the administrators of the schools and industry insiders. I mentioned my frustration to a friend who shared the info with McNair. Through his contacts, ASU got involved and several former ASU graduate students are now working in a field that usually overlooks minorities. MPM members requested him as a speaker year after year; not because he was a celebrity but because he showed an interest in MPM when industry folks thought we were crazy. McNair opened doors without asking for any recognition.

That was typical and classic McNair; his love for people was evident. When Katrina hit the Gulf Coast, the focus was New Orleans. But McNair reminded the world that Mississippi was devastated as well. He used his money to help fill twenty tractor trailers for family, friends, and communities in the Magnolia State. The Wolcotts, friends with hearts that matched McNair’s, sent out pleas on his behalf for help and volunteers responded in droves. From sunup to sundown, they stacked, sorted, and loaded trailers to send down I-55. I called home and told folks McNair’s Calvary was on its way. Within 48 hours, trailers brimming with much needed supplies were in Mississippi. When the USA Army could not get through, McNair’s generosity found a way.

The loss of McNair is overwhelming on so many levels. His life touched many lives every day. He was a bear with such an enormous heart. “Country strong,” my dad would say. McNair was flawed like all of us and his death was tragic, but his love for others will shine brightly. I could not allow this week to go by without expressing my thoughts about the gentle giant. God Bless you Mechelle and the kids. You are in my prayers.

Debra Lee's Circus, The BET Awards

Watching movies and barbecuing is how my family spends most Sunday afternoons. This past Sunday, I broke a cardinal rule and watched the BET Awards for the first time. My kids convinced me that it would be great since it was billed as a tribute to Michael Jackson and his humanitarian endeavors. However, the show that was promoted was not the show I watched. The BET Awards was a chaotic three hour black-a-thon fiasco.

How things begin is an indication of where things will end. Watching CNN’s anchorman Don Lemon giving shouts out on the red carpet was the start of the calamity that went downhill fast. To add to the circus atmosphere that was forming outside, Joe Jackson, MJ’s father and belt wielding former manager, was on the red carpet promoting his new record label. Huh? I know grief is expressed in different ways but this was a drastic departure from tears and sadness that is normally shown. He sounded more like an old school promoter for Denise LaSalle than a father who had lost a son two days prior. But what do I know. I never watched the show and I did not know if this was the norm. Arsenio Hall was raised from the dead and Chaka Khan said something. As for the rest of the folks, I had no idea if they were artists or clowns that were paid to keep us distracted.

Once the “show” started, I cursed myself for partaking in foolishness. I was tweeting throughout the night because my kids could not stand me shouting at them and the TV. New Edition was cute and Jamie Fox was comic relief. The O'Jays, in their yesteryear prom suits, had me dancing. Sugary Ne-yo and Jamie's collaboration was touching. The duet with Monica and Keisha Cole was sassy and had vocal harmony. I loved Keke Palmer throw down. And Maxwell could have sung all night.

But what was up with Queen B’s ballerina-wedding night-wingless angel outfit? Did she sing a song that is the theme for dog rescuers? It was not proper for a MJ tribute. But the pandemonium kept coming; Ray J and the Atlanta vixens, Lil Wayne gold dipped teeth (ew), Ving Rhames, and various characters that had no talent only added to the bizarre profanity laced evening. Don Cornelius rambling intro, which made time stand still, had me praying for the torturous show to end. And let’s not forget the commercials for upcoming BET reality shows that I confused with promos for a support group for incarcerated women.

After the rappers destroyed the English language as we know it and perplexity that would have been right at home at the Hoodie Awards, Mary Mary blessed the show with a gospel song straight from a juke joint. Don't hate, I blog like I see it.

Recognizing Alicia Keys and Wyclef was nice, but, seriously, where was the tribute to MJ? I felt Janet's pain who sounded broken as she reminded the audience that MJ was her brother.

Why the ring mistress of BET, Debra Lee, could not have waited and worked on a show that would have been truly entertaining and befitting to MJ's memory and his work is beyond me. MJ gave $300 million to charities which is rarely mentioned. Focusing on his charitable contributions during his lifetime and how his musical brilliance created an entire genre of music/videos would have rocked the house and lifted spirits. Instead, we were reminded why he lived in a place called “Neverland”. You would have to live in a world of make believe to call the show a tribute. The responses on Twitter and in the blogosphere have been horrific. The poorly orchestrated show did not reflect MJ’s musical influence and minimized the gifts of many talented individuals. I am wondering if the folks at the Stellar Awards would have done a better job. On second thought, never mind, that spaceship will never land.
Photos credit: www.bet.com

Uncle Bud's Fried Peanuts

I have traveled the world. I have met kings and queens, the wannabees and the real ones. Presidents of this and that, Governors who cheat and who don't, Mayors, CEOs, executives, businesses owners, socialites and other fancy type folks and then just plain Bills, Janes, and Sues. No other Genma. But something I have learn that will always know is true, I left the country but the country will never leave me. On with my story...

In my area of Tennessee, there is a little corner market that reminds me of my home town in Mississippi. Everyone greets each other with a hug and yells across the isle to see how the other is doing. None of this nodding crap like they do in Green Hills. There are no strangers at Benson's Foodland, real people with real conversations. It is owned by Mr.Benson and family and has been around for ages. Mr. Benson never smiles and seems aloof. But underneath the hard shell is a heart of gold. He delivers food to the elderly and even allow for store credit. A grocery store that gives folks 30 days to pay their bills? No kidding. Mr. Benson is as grumpy as a bear but I know he is a cub wanting to be hugged.

He sells fresh collards and makes sure I get my bunches every week or so. I have even cooked a pot to share with him a time or two. My daughter buys her sweet potatoes for her pies from him and he in turn makes donations to Oasis Center in her name. Not bad for an old bear.

About four months ago, I noticed a display barrel full of peanuts at check out. As I inspected the new product, I asked Mr. Benson what was the display all about. He said in his driest voice, "You're from Mississippi, don't you eat everything fried." No he diiddn't, I thought to myself. Insulted and intrigued at the same time, I grabbed a bag of Uncle Bud's Fried Peanuts. That was the day I finally understood the slogan, 'You can't eat just one'. They are addictive! I have tried every flavor and they are my new habit. Call Dr. Drew, I am in of an intervention. I was up at 2:00am trying to knockout a few overdue reports and there I was eating my Cajun flavored peanuts and sipping on coke. Life is good.

You must try these peanuts. Cooked, bagged and shipped right here in Tennessee, in a town called Sodd Daisy. Now if that is not country I do not what is. I got the folks on the phone after I had bought my fiftieth bag and told them I run a pest control company and I am coming for a visit. God knows, I cannot eat products by the tonnage and do not know about their pest management program.

They thought I was kidding, until I drove up in my truck with contract in hand. We talked pest control and peanuts for hours. Fascinating company that will be around for quite sometime. Now for all the city slickers wanting to get back to the God's country and get in touch with people food, I have just what you need...go to www.unclebudspeanuts.com. Tell them I sent you. So good you can eat them 'shell-n-all'